EP106 Canceling Our Wedding Was the Best Decision for my Wife & I
In this episode, I share a personal tale about how I called off my wedding to make sure I was the best me I could be.
KC: Welcome to The Business of Life Podcast. My name is Keith Callahan, your host. Yeah, I want to share a story with you that I’m just getting like emotional just thinking about this story. So going to rewind 10 years ago in my life.
Ten years ago on my life, my wife and I – my wife Amy and I were dating. We were living down in Charlotte, North Carolina and we were about to get married. We’re engaged to get married. We’re getting married in three months or so.
We’re getting married in three months and I kept having these thoughts of questioning the marriage. So I kept having these thoughts of questioning the marriage and I would kind of push them down and kind of suppress them.
They kept coming back and we – the venue was set. Her dress was ordered. Invitations had started – yeah, invitations were out and I kept having thoughts of I’m not ready for this. It’s not right. I kept pushing them down.
So I wanted to do this work. It’s called “mirror work” and it’s work that I had done before and it’s basically you use a mirror. So you look at yourself in the mirror and I was doing this work basically saying I’m willing to let go, whatever the resistance is. Like, whatever this final piece is that I’m holding on to, I’m willing to let go of it and when you do that mirror work, you’re getting the vocal part of it. But you’re also seeing yourself. You’re looking in your own eyes, so you’re getting that affirmation as well.
So anyway, I’m doing this mirror work, looking at myself in the eyes, saying, “Whatever it is, I’m willing to let go of it,” and asking for clarity, asking for help and this was also when I was first learning how to pray too, first learning how to connect with my heart. I got a clear as day message that said, “You’re not ready to get married.”
There was no part of my mind of my mental body that wanted to hear that. It literally scared the heck out of me. But it was so true. So I had done all this therapy, all this healing work through my late 20s. I was now 30 years old or about to turn 30 years old and I had never done any of it on my own.
It was like I did all this work and I became this person that I wanted to become or close to it. But I was doing it all while I was with Amy and I realized at that moment that wow, I did all this work. But there’s a final step. I have to be alone. Like, to fully heal, I have to be alone and I’m not projecting anything out on this podcast for anybody else. I want to share this story because it talks about and it shares the importance of really seeking truth in your life and living from your heart 100 percent, not your head.
Like, again, my head, like I wanted to marry her. I wanted to have kids. I wanted to start a family. I wanted the pretty house with the picket fence and all that. I wanted to be a husband. I wanted to be a father. I wanted to have a wife who stayed at home with the family. So yeah, like that’s what I always wanted in my life and now all of a sudden, I’m getting this message that – to call off the wedding.
That day, I shared that with Amy. It was the hardest thing I ever did and imagine her. Like, imagine what she had to go through the – in receiving that message and we called the wedding off. We moved out of the house we were living in, in Charlotte. Both moved back up to Massachusetts where we call home and called the wedding off and it was final. It was a final break-up. It was devastating to her. She was just – she was devastated.
We both kind of went our separate ways and we both always followed the same spiritual path though. We stayed with that spiritual path and I became more and more empowered. I was on my own. I did things on my own and got deeper and deeper involved with the spiritual path, got more connected there and developed a personal power that I never would have been able to develop had I been with her.
Two years later, we were at a ceremony in South Dakota and there was just this like gravitation. So the two of us were – during these two years, we were totally separated. Neither one of us even entertained the idea of getting back together. Her, because she was like, “I’m never going to let him hurt me like that again,” and me because I’m – in my heart, I’m never going to – like I’m not even going to entertain it because I’m never going to hurt her like that again. It was too much.
Then we’re at this ceremony two years later and there’s just this pull towards each other and both of us are ignoring it and there’s this pull and pull and pull and pull. And it’s just so powerful, but we’re both ignoring it. It’s like a two-week ceremony. Then we actually used to drive out then. So we’re driving out, driving home from the ceremony now and we’re both feeling this pulse.
So I’m in a car in front of her. So there are two cars. We’re driving from South Dakota to Massachusetts and I’m in a car that’s pulling a trailer with all of the – all the camping stuff and everything that we bring when we go out here for a ceremony and she’s in her little Yaris. She had a Toyota Yaris then with a few women.
So we were both halfway home where – or a little less than halfway home. We’re around Chicago and we’re on speaker phone. The two cars are on speaker phone and the – we’re playing this game. Think about it. You know, like you’re at ceremony for two weeks and then you’re traveling. It’s literally a three-day drive back.
So you just do things to kill time. So we’re playing this game like if it was your last day on earth, what would you want to do? And it came to me and I was literally like I can’t – I’m not going to play this game because the only thing I could think about is I would want to be with Amy.
But I never wanted to bring that up because I didn’t want to share that because that was like something that I buried down. Not going back there, right? So anyways, didn’t voice that. But we would get to rest stops and her and I would like – it was the weirdest thing. Like we would just gravitate towards each other.
We got home and I forget who reached out to who. But we went for a hike that day together, the two of us. First time we had ever done something alone. Got back together, moved right in, had Dakota, got married. Now we’re married with four kids. I share all of that because I think that there is – there’s a loss of power that we as human beings – especially in today’s society, there’s a loss of power. We’ve lost our power. There used to be a power that people walked with. Some people still walk with this. But the power was the power in following your heart, following your intuition, listening to truth on that deep, deep, deep level.
As I sit here recording this podcast this morning, I wouldn’t be the husband, the father, the man, the mentor, the – like all that stuff, all the beauty that has come into my life. I never could have done that had I not had that couple of years of being alone. It took so much courage to follow through with that because I didn’t mentally want to do it. I didn’t know. We had no intention on getting back together. But having that faith, that real faith, that real love that goes beyond what your mind can conceive and beyond what your mind can believe, that faith in the unknown, all I knew in that moment was that this is true. This is real. This is true. I have to do this.
I didn’t want to do it. But I knew that I had to do it. So I just wanted to share that because so many of us have so many things in our lives that we have to do and we don’t want to do it. We never do it because we’re too afraid.
But the beauty lies in following your heart. So cliché, so corny, right? But I just wanted to share that story because that one thing, that one decision changed my life forever.
All right. Long podcast today. Have a beautiful, beautiful day. See you on the next episode.
KC: Hey, Keith here, and today I have a free gift for you. Listen this free gift is a list of the 12 most influential books that I’ve ever read. These are the books that have helped me to create the mindset, learn the philosophies, learn the skills to really create this big, beautiful, life that we’re living now.
I read a crazy amount of books, I really do. I’ve probably read thousands of books and these are the top 12 books that – they’re the ones that I go to, they’re the ones that I work with over, and over, and over again. They are highlighted, outlined, dog-eared. And I put this list together for you because I want it to be a shortcut.
I don’t want you to have to – you don’t have to go out and read the thousands and thousands of books. These are the 12 that I highly recommend. I have a detailed review for each book, explaining why I recommend them, why I like them, when I worked with them in my life, what part of my life they helped me to improve.
So I put this together for you, and made it super each for you to get this list. All you have to do is send a text to the number 33444 and then in the body of that text, type in “12books” with no space. So that’s the number “12books”. Again, send the text message to the number, address it to 33444 and then type in “12books” as the message and just send that. And that’ll get you setup to receive those top 12 most influential books that have had the biggest impact on my life.
KC: Today’s episode is brought to you by our sister podcast, All About Beachbody Coaching. So All About Beachbody Coaching really allows us to do this podcast without having all those annoying commercials in the beginning for you. So All About Beachbody Coaching, the Beachbody business that Amy and I run, actually funds this podcast.
So yes, it does cost money to run this podcast, we do not charge you anything, we don’t throw in commercials or anything like that, it really is, it’s funded by our business and by our other podcast, All About Beachbody Coaching. And for me, I’m just eternally grateful for this opportunity because it’s allowed me to really create the life that I love to live.
It’s given me the opportunity to do what I want, when I want, with who I want, and even deeper than that, it’s allowed me to help others to create the same for themselves. It’s allowed me to help hundreds of other people become part time or full time Beachbody coaches, to leave that corporate 9 to 5 job and create passive income in their lives.
And really there’s nothing like that. It’s cool when you have success, it’s so much more rewarding when you help others. So I mention this or a few reasons, the first reason is, that’s actually the way that I work with people and mentor people. I don’t do anything outside of Beachbody coaching because I know that it’s such a powerful life changing tool.
So if you’re curious about working with me, interested in working one-on-one, interested in creating the type of life that you wanna live, I suggest swinging over there. The other reason is, even if somebody’s just curious, like you’ve heard about Beachbody, you know there’s a lot of Beachbody coaches out there. Maybe some of them you get a little annoyed with.
It really dives into what this business is really about, which is life transformation. So if you’re just curious, swing over there. And then the other piece is, if you’re really considering becoming a Beachbody coach, I highly, highly recommend you listen to that first.
Alright, much love guys. Again, that is the All About Beachbody Coaching Podcast, our sister podcast.
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